Kellie Finlayson Reflects on Life with Terminal Cancer, Opts for Celebration Over Mourning
Kellie Finlayson, an author and influencer battling stage four bowel cancer for five years, has revealed her unconventional wishes for her passing: no traditional funeral. Instead, she desires her loved ones to celebrate her life rather than mourn her death. Finlayson, who has meticulously organized her affairs, has made her wishes clear to family and friends.
“I’ve got everything in place and I don’t want a funeral,” Finlayson stated. “It’s one thing that I do not want and if that happens, I’ll haunt everyone,” she added with a laugh. “So spread my ashes somewhere or whatever, but I don’t want a funeral and I’ve definitely made that known to anyone that needs to know it. Obviously, I’ve got things in place financially – everything’s got to go to where it’s got to go and I’ve done that myself. If I can have control of one thing, it’s going to be that.”
The wife of former Port Adelaide player Jeremy Finlayson has emerged as a prominent advocate for bowel cancer awareness in Australia. She was diagnosed shortly after the birth of her daughter, Sophia, in 2021. Now 30, Finlayson has surpassed her initial prognosis by approximately three years and continues to undergo intensive treatment, including chemotherapy every three weeks and daily medication.
Navigating Treatment and Family Life
Earlier this month, Finlayson underwent another lung resection after the cancer spread to her lungs in late 2022. Following the surgery, she reassured her supporters via social media, writing, “Thank you so so so much to everyone that has checked in. Surgery went well, will talk about it more when I can keep my eyes open.”
Despite the ongoing medical challenges, Finlayson identifies her daughter Sophia as her primary motivation for continuing to fight. “I would never tell her, not until she’s older at least, but she’s definitely been the reason that I’ve made it this far,” she explained. “You can’t exactly say no to this perfect little human being saying, ‘Mummy, I want to play.’ So she got me out of bed on days that I definitely didn’t want to get out of bed.”
Finding Strength in Treatment and Second Opinions
Finlayson considers herself “one of the lucky ones” because her treatment remains effective. “I’m pretty good at it,” she commented on chemotherapy. “Which is a weird thing to say, but I guess lucky that treatment works for me. So I have three-weekly infusions and then I have chemo tablets daily, morning and night.”
She also revealed that she deviated from her first oncologist’s advice after a relapse in early 2023, believing a different approach has allowed her to continue living a full life. “And if I had listened to my first oncologist, literally, if I’d listened to everything he’d said, I’d be dead by now, which is crazy,” she said. “I would have been in palliative care like three years ago.”
Instead, she sought a second opinion. This decision came after she and Jeremy initially postponed their wedding when the cancer spread. The couple later married in a low-key ceremony.
Challenges and Future Aspirations
The couple has also faced the emotional toll of seven unsuccessful IVF embryo transfers in their efforts to give Sophia a sibling. “We actually had seven failed transfers, so it was a really tough 16 months,” Finlayson shared. “Obviously things didn’t work, but that’s fine… it ended up costing me more mentally than it was worth.”
Finlayson intentionally separates conversations about her illness from her home life. “Home is not the hospital and hospital is where those conversations happen and home is where it’s just us living,” she stated. She prefers discussing a “living list” over a bucket list, joking, “That’s because I don’t want to kick the bucket.”
Her current focus is on leveraging her experiences to encourage younger Australians to prioritize their health and seek medical advice when something feels amiss. “But I’ve got so many things in the works,” she said. “I just want to be in front of rooms of people that haven’t heard me speak before so that they take themselves a little bit more seriously and that’s kind of the aim this year.”
While acknowledging the presence of difficult days, Finlayson remains resolute in making the most of her time. “I say I’m one of the lucky ones because treatment works for me,” she affirmed. “I am genuinely one of the lucky ones.”
